queen_of_poise

Kansas loli meetup

Tue, 16 Dec 2008 04:16:15 GMT

So, i'm trying to throw together a kansas meetup, since they never happen ;____;

Crown center (kansas city, MO) ice skating in february?
Offical centre_loli post here---> http://community.livejournal.com/centre_loli/15802.html?mode=reply

Tue, 02 Sep 2008 18:41:22 GMT

http://community.livejournal.com/egl_comm_sales/3352413.html#cutid1

Please buy my dresses ;____;

Fri, 29 Aug 2008 14:44:48 GMT

noooo!!! Someone bid on my dress *commits suicide*

So, I went dancing alone last night for the first time. It was rather annoying. I got hit on by 4 5 people. Somebody has to go with me next time.

Fri, 29 Aug 2008 01:56:34 GMT

!!!!!!! BUY MY DRESS SO THAT I CAN PURCHASE MY DREAM VICTORIAN MAIDEN DRESS !!!!!!!

!!!http://community.livejournal.com/egl_comm_sales/3304997.html#cutid1!!!

capslock is cruise control for cool.

Anyway, the VM dress I want is

Wed, 27 Aug 2008 22:22:56 GMT

I'm going to start a specifically lolita blog over on blog-spot. I have to name it still, hmmm :\

Tue, 19 Aug 2008 00:46:56 GMT

Lol, the house doens't have any electricity, so we've had a real hard time moving in. It gets turned on tomorrow.
Oh! And it was very exciting to learn that they own a violin that no one uses, so I will deffinately start learning it.

Sun, 17 Aug 2008 21:02:31 GMT

Life is truely beeeaauuutifullll :DDD

I live in Lawrence now, pwahahaha!

Oh, i'm not getting that violin, there was a pink mp3 player that I needed more.

Sat, 16 Aug 2008 04:28:54 GMT

Woah, suddenly me and skyler have a cellphone and a car!

Sun, 10 Aug 2008 22:07:36 GMT

TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY WISH ME HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

my stomach hurts ;___; baaaad

Thu, 07 Aug 2008 22:02:48 GMT

Oh man! Life is looking up for once!

I'm probably moving to lawrence next month with skyler. We're just going to live in his step-dad's basement, so no rent! Yeah!! More money for lolita.
I'm excited for the job options in lawrence, it's so much more fun there.
My plan is to work in a bubble tea place so that I can wear lolita to work everyday!!

My birthday is in three days, i'm a little depressed about it, but I think I already mentioned it in an earlier emo post. But presents make it happy! Well, I mean, I won't be getting many, and i'm fine with that really. I always forget people birthdays (and i'm always too poor to buy presents) so I would feel guilty if people got me things.
If I'm ever rich, I hope i'm known for always getting people the best gifts. A lot of people think i'm really selfish, which is true, but I love giving people things...
Anyway! My mom can't really buy me anything since she is poor and starting her new career, but she filed my income tax returns for me! So with that money I'm going to buy:

black secret shop ap tea party replica shoes! Augh! I am so tired of uncomfortable shoes, and these look sooo comfy. I think I may have mentioned this also. Ahhh~ imagine, I could actually run in these. My biggest iff about lolita how non-condusive to my lifestyle it is. I like to play and climb and get dirty, and you just cant do that in platforms or heels. So these shoes will be like... gifts from god. Plus, I don't have any basic black lolita shoes, they're either to punky, or too classic.

And my second present from my lover <3<3<3

A pink electric violin! :D I want to learn the violin so baaaad! Along with the cello. Actually, one of my life goals is to master string instruments. Mainly; guitar, violin, cello, and piano (yes, it counts)
It's pretty cheap to an instrument too, infact, I'm really not sure on the quality, but it doesn't matter to much for a beginner's instrument.

I'm in such a good mood <3
Adderall.
I has it.
Not my own prescription, but I will have one someday. I'm realizing that I have add, for realz, and i'm not just abusing this stuff, haha.
I'm so focused, and talkative, and I feel like this is the REAL me. I'm not some shy spacey girl like I always appear to be. I'm social, I really really am. I think i'm just depressed to hell so I don't act like I should. Adderall also takes away my depression, ahhh~

I don't know why i'm depressed, it's probably just one of those chemical imbalances, because my life really isn't that bad. I guess maybe me extreme hatred for my body might be the cause....it goes beyond just thinking i'm fat, but let's not get into this right now!!
I dunno, now i'm thinking about it, adderall let's me actually think for once and I don't just zone out. Like... I think puberty came way too fast for me, and it really messed me up. Suddenly I had to deal with a sexy body that I didn't (and still don't) want. This caused emotional eating, which made me faaaaaaat. Being fat is just my surface problem. My hatred didn't evolve out of me being fat, me being fat evolved out of my depression. I have conquered my emotional eating, but I still have a hard time with compulsive and boredom eating.
I really wish I could just be a stick-figure, or more boy like. I hate my double d's and "junk in the trunk", they disgust me. Sometimes just thinking about sex alone disgusts me (even though I enjoy pervy humor). A lot of the time I wish I was asexual, or something like that.

Ahhh, sorry that got way out of hand there.

I'm going dancing tonight! With a small group of people, yay! Usually it's just me and one other person, but tonight it's; me, zoe, chan, and maybe justin..? But it will be fun!! Oh, but chan said that thursday night is gay night at the granada, and if that's true we'll do that instead since i've always wanted to go to a gay night or club. I read online that gay night is on wednesday, but when me and zoe tried to find it, everything was closed, augh! It was such a bad night.

Oh, we got hit by a semi-truck on the highway the other day, it was fun. Lol. Zoe's car is hardcore (SUV) all it did was mess up the bumper and the alignment. Her sideview mirror was even still on! How the hell does that happen!?!?
The only bad thing is she has to pay insurance stuff. The cop deemed it noone's fault, which is pretty good though...
I'm in too good of a mood to really go into this, but, getting hit by the semi told me that I don't really value my life much, ahaha. Everyone else was all shaken, but I didn't evne give a damn. Even when I saw the semi closing in on our side, I wasn't even scared...

Anyways! I'm sure i'm boring you so I shall leave!!

Wed, 06 Aug 2008 19:04:10 GMT

...
I love lolita xD
i'm not selling anything, auuuugh.

except those shoes... I hate them. I'm going to make my mom get me those secret shop tea party replicas for my birthday. I'm tired of uncomfortable shoes! Tea parties look sooo nice.

I washed that brown and white plaid jsk, and now it's more like... brown and ivory ;____;

Fri, 01 Aug 2008 02:46:27 GMT

I made a fursona, ahaha! It's a corgi. But it's the kind where is just looks like an animal with hair on it. Anthropomorphic things are ugly.

I'm so pissed that the band name "the plastic fantastics" is already taken. I was totally going to use it.

Sat, 19 Jul 2008 10:17:44 GMT

Holy cow, it's 5:19am and i'm still awake.

Fri, 18 Jul 2008 03:40:05 GMT

Arrrg! I broke on of my meta jsk's buttons, I always break something on these damn dresses.

In other news, so excited for the dark night! See my icon that I ~~scribbled on with ms paint~~ made?

Thu, 17 Jul 2008 02:40:21 GMT

One my cousins just got shot 10 times and died today at a local bar (whiplash) today. Over a game of pool.
But knowing him, it was for more than that...

Tue, 15 Jul 2008 19:52:14 GMT

My kitty had kittens!
4!
one black and white, one black, one gray, one gray with a white face mark.

Tue, 08 Jul 2008 16:15:16 GMT

So I got my meta dress.
It's way too freaking long ;___; just like any other meta i've ever tried on.
I'll prolly sell it...

Mon, 07 Jul 2008 06:24:24 GMT

I'm going to sell all of my lolita things, except two or three...
I just hate buying and wearing brand clothing, I want cheap off-brand that I don't have to worry about ruining all the time. But, augh. Cheap lolita does not exist, so I don't know what to do...
Anyway, i'll be selling:
BSSB blackxwhite jsk (lucky pack 07?) ($120)
BSSB brown plaid jsk ($125)
BSSB black cutsew ($50)
IW piano OP ($150)
META plaid swan embroidery jsk ($125)
META white parasol ($40)
Fanplusfriend VM bustle skirt replica ($40)
Fanplusfriend tophat ($15)
Fanplusfriend blouse ($30)
Applesugar headbow ($15)
Demonia blackwhite charade shoes ($45)
Montreal pinkxwhite shoes ($30)
Morbid black blouse ($15)
EGL community tshirt ($15)
Random blackxwhite polkadot skirt ($35)

So I should get like... $610? (I took out ~shipping)

Is there anyone I could commission to get get cheap $50 dresses? Haha...

Sat, 05 Jul 2008 14:18:59 GMT

Well, I had a pretty fun fourth of july.

A couple days ago skyler and I met some new people. They're pretty fun. We've kinda been bumming around at their house-thingy. It has an amazing jacuzzi-bathtub.
So anyway, me and the two people, zoe and tama, go for a walk. First, we find bowser in a creek! It was a gigantic snapping turtle, actually, but it was crazy!! AAhh! Then we went to the top of burnet's mound (highest haunted hill in topeka) and watched the fireworks that were happening all over the city. It was amazing, it looked like a war.
Then we watched stranger than fiction, which was really good.
I also watched juno, and I really loved it. Part of me feels bad, but oh well.
I want a hamburger phone. Well, I don't really like hamburgers, maybe something else... I ebay-ed bananaphone, but all I got was a cell-phone cover.

Thu, 03 Jul 2008 20:13:55 GMT

Lol, sorry for that last entry, I was out of it.

uh... my life has been extremely interesting these past 3 days, but I don't feel like going into detail.

I haven't seen a scale or been watchigng what I eat. I'm really really scared i've gained like, 10 pounds. Fuck.

Fri, 27 Jun 2008 00:13:23 GMT

Lol, so I weight myself, and i'm 133. I then walk for two hours, and then I weigh 135. Wut?
Haha. My weight fluctuates so weirdly, it's amusing. I still don't know what my ideal weight is. It's difficult since i'm short. If I said my goal was 110, you might freak out, but remember that I'm a midget! I'll still prolly be fat at 110, lol!
Sklyer comes back tomorrow, I'm so excited! Oh, and he's going to be in the summer camp play, how cute! D'awwwwwww.
I'm working on a new painting, it's pretty cool so far.
Oh, we found the camera, so once I charge it i'll take a picture of my last painting. It's tiny haha. I did it on a shoebox lid. I was inspired by this:

It's not a shoe box, but it's scrapbook paper on top of carboard. I had some scrapbook paper that had bought because I loved it, but hadn't had any use for it. I bought it years ago, lol.
I kinda think it's a cop-out to use predecorated paper as your background, so I prolly wont utilize this method again, but it intrigued me enought to try it.
So on top of the scrapbook paper I glued on a water color painting of a person with flowers coming out of their mouth. Lately I tend to draw somewhat androgynous people. I think it's me forcing myself to draw males. Lol.
My next painting after the one i'm working on it a pretty crossdressing boy, awwwww <3
but the one i'm working on... it's a surreal/trippy piece. I really wanted to draw some smoke after I saw:

I've loved this piece since I first saw milattack post the head/hair drawing. Ahhhh, it's so lovely.

Once skyler comes back I am excited for nude drawing sessions, ahaha! Omg, I love drawing the figure when it's right in front of me. I've really only been able to do it twice in my life. I mean, we had a model sometimes in highschool art class, but it was really more of a basic "here's how to draw poses" kind of thing. And they weren't naked. I love naked people.
Honestly though, I remember when I was 9, my mom would have people complain/worrying inform her that I was drawing naked people, lol. I just love drawing human for, in both artistic ways, and naughty ways (tee-hee)
the two times I have been able to do it were both in washburn. Not in actually class because you start out at basic drawing and dont' get to advance things late, augh. They were some highschool meets college thing. I dunno. It was great. I remember really getting lost in this one girls face, and I was really upset that my hour of drawing time was up and I had to move along. I still wish I could finish that picture. The model looked so tired, I loved it.
but yeah, i'm rambling here...
I'm glas that lately i've been more inspired to do art. I was really worried about myself for a while there. I think college, for a while, killed all of my inspiration.
Now i'm wokring on doing enough pieces so that I can have a "portofolio" to show some local galleries and hopefully get some of my work hung up. Right now i'm not concerned with selling things, but i'm putting myself out there so that I can become more well known, and hopefully when I'm older be good enough to fully support myself on art alone. That is what my heaven is like. OH, that and a million lolita dresses.
Ah, lolita is so frusterating, I don't even want to thing about it right now.

Wed, 25 Jun 2008 06:49:36 GMT

Aaaaaaaaah! Why am I still awake!?
I've been so lonely these last three nights, because before then, I hadn't slept alone in like... 4 months, augh.
Fucking summer camp, why did you take my skyler?

I'm going to diiiiiiieeeeeee.

Wed, 25 Jun 2008 06:03:40 GMT

from /stim/ on 420chan

anon- I just watched on the news a little while ago how Adderall is becoming a real epidemic in my town here in California.
anon2- Epidemic?
OH NO THE STREETS OF BUMFUCK, CALIFORNIA ARE CROWDED WITH PEOPLE WHO DON'T EAT VERY MUCH, TALK REAL FAST AND CAN CLEAN THEIR ROOMS LIKE MOTHERFUCKERS.

fucking hilarious

I love addy

Mon, 16 Jun 2008 17:54:16 GMT

Arrr... I have to work today >:(

mai said it would take 2-3 weeks for the "economy" mail to ship my dress ;__;

Fri, 13 Jun 2008 22:13:45 GMT

omg, why hasnt mai invoiced me yet? It's been like two weeks...